if i suddenly die

i always was what i am

love left me with scars

got me fearing being alive

all apologies

“what else should i’d be?”

i don’t know who i am

i don’t know who i was

i don’t even know what happened

and when i say that in my entire existence

i just am sure of only thing about myself

even though there’s a only single thing that i know

it’s something certain about myself

i have been was suicidal

if somewhere, someday, in someway i suddenly die

here is the statement of the truthful cause

•

obs: please, write in my grave: “i told that i was sick.”

obs number two: “i always have been telling everyone in the lowest, the middle or the highest point of the disaster. guess? they saw me and designed me as a clown, like if i was just exaggerating or whatever, faking it? for attention? attention for actually… maybe, dying? honestly, it should have been told that all that was for real and well, even though i still can see in the back of mind what i’m going to tell now, i do remember some shit… i remember that i said it too many times actually and always wanted to make sure that it was seriousness. i mean and meant decades of my miserable life. in this note, i am or i was twenty four years old when it wrote it, just check the data of it.